There you are, quite happy with the Ronaldos, Fabregas' and Drogbas that litter your team, dripping with talent and overflowing with creativity and some old man in a grey suit in FIFA headquarters decides you have to play 6 Englishmen in every game you play from 2012/13.
Imagine, trading your Torres for a Timothy, your Kanu for a Keith or your Reyes for a Rooney (well, ok, I'd maybe let that last one pass)
But just because your average British teenager stuffs his face with chips, flows beer down his throat at a rate of knots and can't get a game for Peterboro while the continental superstars are doing star jumps, eating grilled fish and queuing up to play for Benfica, Bratislava or Bradford, it doesn't mean a special dispensation should be granted for footballers that don't make the grade.
This is protectionism of the worst kind. Free markets and lifting the barriers to employment are the progressive policies that should apply to all walks of life, even something as deliciously low-brow as domestic football.
And to further bolster my argument, even the EU agrees and we've already seen what kind of awful decision-making can come from those based in Strasbourg. (I've just realised that using an entity with wacky decision-making pedigree to back me up is an odd choice of ally. But still, the law of large numbers dictates they have to get one right one of these days!)
FIFA's argument, I understand, is that clubs using local players will boost the national team and give the club itself a stronger link to the country it is based in. Well, anyone watching the SPL run in will be in no doubt that the link between local fans and international players can still be very, very strong indeed.
The Celtic line-up against Dundee United on that awesome Thursday evening that won the SPL title shows it well. A Dutchman scored the goal, an Irishman jinxed and jigged down the wings, a Pole saved the United shots and a Japanese guy pulled the strings in midfield. Do you think they understood any less what a 3rd SPL title in a row meant to Celtic Football Club? Were the fans more proud of the Scottish players on the pitch that night?
And now I think about it, what an awful way to bring segragation back to the heart of clubs that have worked so hard to end such ugly affairs. Ajax I believe was riddled with racist issues only recently, I remember Mark Walters at Rangers having bananas thrown at him in his first few games (from his own fans!), John Barnes had to play through some of the worst racial abuse back in the 80s and the current UEFA cup holders pride themselves on never having had a black player in its history. Do we really want an "Us and them" situation in clubs all across Europe? It would be a red rag to the Spanish and Eastern European fans who are notoriously and aggressively prejudiced in this darkest of ways.
So, no more lazy, backward thinking just to convince yourselves that you justify your high salaries. You overpaid bigwigs at UEFA and FIFA should just relax and enjoy the football. You've got EURO 2008 to sit and watch from the corporate boxes for the next month, don't be wasting time with silly new rules now. Just let the Manchester Uniteds, the AC Milans and the Barcelonas do what they do best and allow the best players to get the best opportunities whatever town or city they happened to be born in.
Not that I still harbour secret desires of turning out for Bayern Munich as a Meadows-discovered rough diamond or anything. Although perhaps I should be relegating my dream team to Helsingborg as time is marching on here….
NOTE: Gordon Smith, SFA chief, has said Blatter's plan should be given the "green light without condition". Thanks Gordon, thanks for nothing...